


How to Clean Your Jewels (The Cola Fic)

by Bluey greeny love (blueygreenylove)



Category: One Direction
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Baby Harry, Bondage, Bottom Harry, Cola kink, Cola waterfall, Crack Fic, Daddy Kink, Daddy Louis, Dom Louis, Dom/sub, Established Relationship, Grinding, Handcuffs, Humor, I'm Sorry, M/M, Multiple Orgasms, Object Insertion, PWP, Pinterest hacks, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Rimming, Smut, Some kinda weird AU, Sub Harry, The word scrotum, Tickling, Top Louis, because why not, blowjob, cola - Freeform, jewel cleaning, lots and lots of cola, scrotum, things you shouldn't be doing with cola
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-10
Updated: 2017-09-10
Packaged: 2018-12-26 01:53:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12048873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueygreenylove/pseuds/Bluey%20greeny%20love
Summary: Louis comes home to Harry cleaning his jewels with cola and....gets inspired.I fully blame The Plumily GC™





	How to Clean Your Jewels (The Cola Fic)

**Author's Note:**

> THIS IS ONLY FOR THE PURPOSE OF MAKING YOU LAUGH. It's obviously not a serious fic, and my writing is actually nothing like this but we got the idea and thought why not. I apologize in advance. Hope you enjoy.

After a long, hard day at work, Louis walked in and rested his head against the door, happy to be home. He started calling for Harry, but he couldn't find him anywhere, so he immediately went upstairs and heard noise coming from the en suite bathroom. He walked in, only to find Harry with a ton of rings and a Coca Cola bottle. He snorted, as his huge dork of a boyfriend never failed to surprise him. "Oh hi, love." Harry said, completely focused on what he was doing. "What...what are you doing?" Louis asked, giggling. "My rings have been looking a bit dirty recently, and I thought I'd try this Pinterest hack."

-"Who even still goes on Pinterest?"

-"Ummm, I do. Anyways, it said that if I pour cola onto my jewelry it'll be shiny and pretty again. So I thought I'd try it."

-"Babe? BABE? Look at the ring you're holding, the gem's melting!"

-"What are you- WHAT THE FUCK? THIS WASNT WHAT PINTEREST TOLD ME."

-"Why are you still pouring cola on it you idiot? Stop!"

Louis grabbed the bottle out of Harry's hands so he could stop him from completely destroying his ring. Once they put the bottle down, they began looking at the ring intensely to try and figure out how much damage was done to it.

"Ugh dammit. It completely ruined the ring. Good thing it isn't one I care about much anyway." Harry said, annoyed. "You're such an idiot honestly....you shouldn't be following Pinterest hacks!" Louis said, torn between laughing and shaking his head in disappointment.

-"Yeah well how would I know? It said it worked."

-"Why didn't you just go on YouTube where you can see shit when it happens?"

-"Look, I don't know, okay? Anyways, let's forget about this. Come on. You haven't even changed yet."

They left the bathroom and went back into the bedroom, and Louis started to get undressed. As he was doing so, he felt Harry's eyes burning holes into him because of the intensity of his gaze. He turned to face him, smirking, and Harry looked away, blushing like a baby. "Aww are you blushing? You do realize you could've kept staring, right?" Louis said, teasingly. Harry just hid his face in a pillow playfully. "Oh come on, love. We've been together for three years. I'd think you got used to how I look shirtless."

Louis climbed onto the bed and straddled Harry's thighs. He then began mercilessly tickling his sides, making Harry augh uncontrollably. "You're actually a five year old." Louis said, laughing at how adorable Harry was being. After a minute, he stopped tickling Harry and dropped down to kiss him. He hadn't given him his "hello" kiss yet.

"Did you have some of that cola before you used it to...clean your rings?" Louis asked in between kisses that were slowly getting deeper. "Why're you asking?" Harry said, voice already dropping lower. "I taste it on you." Louis said, as he started subtly grinding onto Harry, making him let out soft, quite moans.

With that sentence, Louis got an idea. He'd always wanted to know what that would be like, and this felt like the perfect occasion to try it. "Baby? Can we try something?" He said in a more dominant voice. "Mhm. Anything for you, daddy." Harry replied easily like the little good boy he was.

Before Louis left to get what he needed, he let Harry completely undress himself and handcuffed him to the bed. Harry was already getting hard, an effect louis always had on him. Louis left him like that, whining slightly, to go into the bathroom and grab the cola bottle. When he walked back in, Harry smirked at him upon seeing the cola bottle, obviously understanding part of what was gonna happen.

"Okay, baby. Now be good and stay still for me, can you?" He said once he got on the bed, and Harry just smiled happily and laid back, probably expecting a finger inside him. What he did not expect, however, was the cold bottle brushing his sides, then going up and down his dick, all the way down to his balls. He squirmed and yelped a lot, and Louis was helpless to smirk.

He did that a few more times, if only to see Harry shut his eyes tightly and groan. This is gonna be fun.

He opened the cola bottle, and the fizz made Harry's eyes open wide. "Lou-" the moment the word came out of his mouth, Louis looked at him disapprovingly. "I mean, daddy, what are you doing?" He asked, confused. "Don't ask questions, baby. Just take what you get."

Harry sighed, and before he knew it, cola was being poured onto the base of his dick and his scrotum. "Daddy!" He squirmed, the cold liquid fizzing and tingling all over. "Feel good, baby?" Louis asked smugly. As Harry was about to answer, Louis poured more cola onto his balls, which made him moan in response. "That's what I thought." Louis muttered.

“Daddy...what-what are you doing?” Harry asked in between moans. “I'm cleaning your jewels, baby.” Louis replied, the smirk on his face constant. Louis poured more onto him, making him very sticky. He could hear it fizzing, probably skiing wonders to Harry's dick. But the thought that stood out most to him was that he wanted to taste, so he leant down and began licking Harry's scrotum in tiny kitten licks.

"Nnngh daddy!" Harry groaned, and Louis kept licking him clean, both to get those reactions out of him and because he loved how his boy tasted. After he was done getting him all clean, he made him messy again, pouring cola all over his dick. Harry couldn't stop moaning at that point, feeling tingles everywhere. Louis then leant down again to take the head of Harry's dick into his mouth. Harry groaned, then, and he only kept getting louder and louder as Louis made his way down. There was something about how the cola tasted along with Harry's precum that made Louis just want more and more, so he kept going till he reached the base of Harry's dick, bobbed his head a few times, then pulled off, making Harry whine. He then took one of Harry's balls into his mouth, rolling it around a little, savoring the taste and the noises Harry was making.

Then he had an even better idea, so he completely pulled off and reached for the bedside table to grab the lube. Harry was panting and he already looked fucked out, but Louis knew he would like what was to come.

He grabbed the lube and squirted some into him middle finger, then he pushed his finger slowly into Harry's arse. Harry whimpered loudly, squirming again. Soon enough, Harry was riding three of Louis' fingers and asking for more. Now the best part of this plan was coming into action.

Louis pulled his finger out and grabbed the bottle of lube again, and he squirted some liberally onto the cola bottle. Harry looked like he wanted that cola bottle more than anything he ever did, so Louis gave it to him. He reached he tip of the bottle into Harry's arse, and Harry immediately began moaning again. He kept pushing the cola bottle in further till the only part left was the one he was holding onto, so he pulled it back out and began fucking it not Harry at a fast pace. Apparently he hadn't closed the bottle properly, because very shortly cola was pouring out of Harry's arse like some type of cola waterfall, and Harry himself was moaning louder. Louis just went down to suck onto Harry's rim and catch the cola in his mouth, and soon enough, his tongue was inside Harry along with the bottle.

Harry was writhing hopelessly, but there was no escape. The bottle was pushing up against his prostate and the cola was making his insides tingle. "Daddy gon-gonna come! Please!" He moaned, and Louis just went faster, giving him an "okay". Soon enough, Harry was coming, spurts of his coming falling down to mix in with the cola all over him. Once he stopped coming, Louis took the bottle out and immediately replaced it with his dick. Harry was moaning again, but the loudest noise in the room was the squelching the cola and Harry's come made with every thrust.

Louis kept fucking him till they both came, adding more to the mess. Louis then spread Harry's legs and dug in, cleaning him up from all the cola and come covering him, even pulling a third orgasm out of Harry, who was completely destroyed at that point, and so was his arsehole.

"How was that, babe?" Louis asked once he was done. "That was fucking amazing. How did you think of that?" Harry said, still quite woozy. "I just saw you with the bottle and got inspired, I guess."

-"One problem though."

-"And that is?"

Louis pulled Harry out of bed so they could go shower, letting Harry lean on him because he was too sore to walk.

-"Now not only is my jewelry ruined because of cola, but it's all over our bed."

-"So? We'll clean it up."

-"Cola stains aren't easy to clean, silly."

-"I said we'll find a way to clean them. Stop whining." Louis said, with fond eyes and a fond smile.

-"Such a demanding Daddy, aren't you?"

-"You know me well, darling."

-"Well, next time, can you at least use a towel to get all the sticky, liquidy mess?"

-"Does this men's there'll be a next time?"

-"Let's just say I'll make sure to buy cola bottles when I go grocery shopping."

**Author's Note:**

> In case you've something to say, my twitter is @blueygreenylove .


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